Pain and Progress
It hurts to alienate people I love with my words. Unfortunately I can only assume this is part of the process. There is no change without struggle, nor without breaking out of familiar patterns and comfortable exchanges.
It's hard to see things the way I see them now, but when I think about trying to "go back," it is impossible. Though I am now liberated to clearly view my choices about the impact I make, I also feel condemned to obsession with the idea that I must do more. Others believe I hold them to the same standards. I do and I don't. I hold people accountable to do only what they can do, and to think about their actions. If all they do is think and never make a change, I've still accomplished something. Though I believe we have a very serious responsibility to undo the damage we've done ("we" meaning the human race, not just our generation) ... I also believe strongly that we are victims of an insidious system which, though it presents a certain freedom, has imprisoned us psychologically and will not relinquish its hold on us with ease. I do not know enough about capitalism to imagine whether it can work without massive destruction in its wake, but I do know that as far as our species and countless others are concerned, it's a death sentence. Our culture is devolving and we're taking our beautiful, mysterious world with it. Yes, the planet will continue to exist regardless ... but in what form? And what of the suffering of people and animals while it is in its death throes?
We've been trained to want. It feels natural. But for those of us who can break out of it, we must. Our example will plant seeds in others. In my lifetime I hope to see the change on a wider scale, but that's neither here nor there. I must act as though the change is beginning with me. I'm starting with the man in the mirror. Ha ha. That reminds me, listen to Tuck Andress' version of this tune, if you never have. As a matter of fact, hear this album if you get the chance: Reckless Precision. (I almost said "buy this album" ... I don't want to tell anyone to buy anything!!)
Incidentally, the only time I get to stop thinking about this stuff is when I'm playing music. Or when I'm sleeping - though I suspect my subconscious doesn't let go entirely. I'm so grateful for the music. My wish for you is that you have something that fully engages you and makes the rest of your troubles fall away.
But I digress.
Though it's difficult to explain myself to others, and though my outspokenness might appear radical and self-righteous, I must continue on this journey. I am called to make these changes and learn as much as I can. I'm called to speak about it. There's no less love in my heart for even the rich white guy with the biggest SUV and six houses full of stuff, who thinks the world is ours to own and exploit. I have love in my heart for all of us, and I weep for what we've become. I also know we're a wonderful, miraculous species with the potential to make beautiful music, plant gardens, tell stories, help our loved ones, dance with each other, care for our sick, seek solutions, and live in harmony with the Earth from which we began. If I did not have this vision I could sink back into apathy and nihilism. I cannot.
posted by SustainableGirl @ 9:11 AM
2 comments
2 Comments:
I hear you, totally. Sadly, I believe that most people are even less likely to "organize and fight back" than they are are to abandon their cars and ride a bike to work. I have been reading the Socialist Worker website and I am really intrigued and want to learn more, both about what a new system could mean, and how I could help to bring it about. Where I take issue is this idea that people in the suburbs have to use their cars?? What??? They've never heard of buses? If there's not a bus line near their house, they've never heard of a park-n-ride? Naturally the whole system needs restructuring. The structure now serves the few rather than the many. However, what I see, and cannot un-see, is that there is not enough time left for this ailing planet to wait for the societal restructuring before we make changes and personal sacrifices. I would be hard-pressed to believe that anyone "has to" drive their car to work, unless they live in a rural area too far from their workplace. The difference between what we perceive as "need" and "want" is our biggest problem as consumers, and I blame it entirely on the manipulative corporate industry which encourages us from birth forward to abandon active living for passive entertainment and the acquisition of material goods. The extreme example of PETA and converting everyone to veganism doesn't really help me see this situation any more clearly. There are lots of words that can be said, but none of them seem like much more than excuses for not making these difficult changes, IN ADDITION to fighting for social justice and restructuring of the system as a whole. I am doing my part the only way I can right now, and the more I learn, the more I can help in other areas than just environmentally. Meanwhile, I believe a small impact is better than none.
There's no shifting of blame in anything I advocate. I've noticed since I began this process that people quickly want to shift blame AWAY from themselves, in order to justify continued participation in wanton and destructive consumerism while waiting for capitalism to fall apart, or for the fragile system of this planet to collapse. I recognize it because I fight this battle within myself every day. We will be more effective in the bigger battles when we disengage from the system of created wants. As I have said before, we are all responsible. While we're working for capitalism to change or disappear, STOP BUYING STUFF. START WALKING. SUPPORT COMPANIES THAT ADVOCATE SUSTAINABILITY. There's simply no excuse for not doing it once you are informed ... I don't care who you are.
Post a Comment
<< Home